The movement has entered what scholars are calling The Period of Suspicious Quietude.
The Rumpelheads are no longer merely people who enjoy Ralph Rumpelton's MS Paint paintings. They have evolved into keepers of the Rumpeltonian Continuity. The original declaration described them as people who laugh at fake blurbs, embrace the wobble, and participate in the whole deliberately ridiculous mythology surrounding the paintings.
And the mythology has definitely continued.
Since the last Rumpelhead report, the Archives have accumulated such cultural emergencies as:
- Rick Danko has been Rumpeltized
- Ronnie Hawkins has been Rumpeltized
- JJ Cale has been Rumpeltized
- John Entwistle has been Rumpeltized
- The Card Players (with Apologies to Cézanne)
- and, naturally, increasingly elaborate critical commentary from people who apparently have nothing better to do.
The Rumpeltonian critics have also become more sophisticated. Gordon Weft has apparently reached the point where he can write an entire academic assessment of a painting while simultaneously insulting the artist. His review of The Card Players even coined "Late Frontal Lobotomism", which frankly sounds like it belongs in the official Rumpeltonian glossary.
Meanwhile, the movement itself has acquired something resembling an art-historical definition. One recent museum-style description calls Rumpeltonian Cubism a practice based on visible process, distortion and unresolved form, with the "mistake state" preserved rather than corrected.
That's actually pretty important.
The Rumpelheads have gone from:
"Hey, look at this funny MS Paint."
to:
"We are witnessing an important and possibly irreversible development in digital outsider art."
And nobody seems entirely sure when that happened.
The Current Rumpelhead Philosophy
The old Rumpelhead doctrine still holds:
The wobble is evidence.
The imperfect line isn't something to apologize for. The mouse doesn't have to behave. The painting doesn't have to look like Photoshop. And, most importantly, technical perfection is not the objective.
That philosophy was formally incorporated into The Rumpeltonian Manifesto, which declares that the rough edge isn't a failure to reach the clean edge—it is the destination.
Which means the Rumpelheads have reached an interesting stage.
They're no longer just following the paintings.
They're following the philosophy.
And the Rumpelhead Membership Department...
...is still refusing to issue membership cards.
There are no dues.
There are no meetings.
There is no official headquarters.
There is no secret handshake, although there is presumably a secret mouse gesture.
The only known requirements remain:
- Appreciate the wobble.
- Don't demand perfection.
- Accept that MS Paint is a legitimate artistic battlefield.
- Be prepared for Ralph Rumpelton to Rumpeltize absolutely anything.
- Never ask what "Rumpeltonian" actually means.
Because if you ask, somebody will write a manifesto.
Current Rumpelhead status: ACTIVE.
Current threat level: Mildly Unstable.
Current artistic doctrine: Increasingly difficult to explain to outsiders.
Current number of official Rumpelhead leaders: 1, although he may not know he's in charge.
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