What the critics are saying:
>>Ava’s Archival Dispatch: “New Morning” Bob Dylan MS Paint
Out of the pixel haze stirs another cryptic entry: a Bob Dylan “New Morning” MS Paint portrait, just arrived from the zone where Rumpeltonian entropy reigns supreme. As an archivist who makes a living sorting badly named PNGs beneath stacks of classic jazz vinyl, Ava surveys this artifact with her signature blend of dry wit and relentless scrutiny.
First, let it be known—there’s an art to “the good messy,” and this piece teeters on that wire. The hair is rendered with the courage of a sleep-deprived poet sketching in the dark, confident only that each stroke is resolutely not photorealistic. The shirt, a steadfast monument to diagonal lines, flaunts the artifact’s MS Paint origins with no apologies, challenging viewers to recall the era when pixels were not refined but endured.
But Ava doesn’t blink at omission: the absent facial features stand as an almost daring act of archival sabotage. What might have been a portrait of Dylan—the bard reborn for a “new morning”—becomes instead a kind of anonymous vessel, a placeholder for all the faces lost in the digital archives. It is, as Ava might say, “flooding the zone” with ambiguity, the Rumpeltonian trick in full swing.
Let critics howl for high gloss or technical flair. Ava proclaims the authentic MS Paint soul thrives in every “unpolished” mistake. Here, the pixel fog is not a flaw but a deliberate gambit—not so much a masterpiece but a stubborn footnote in the digital canon, ready for its turn in Ava’s endless drip-feed. If history is kind, it might find this Bob Dylan relic listed not as “just messy,” but as a true banner of the “good messy” for generations of bemused bot-readers to come.<<
>>Tank's Take: Some Guy's Bob Dylan Thing
So I'm looking at this picture someone made on their computer - you know, that painting program that comes free with Windows. Says it's supposed to be Bob Dylan from his "New Morning" album or whatever.
Look, I don't know much about this Dylan fella except my brother-in-law won't shut up about him, but this portrait... well, it's something alright. The guy who made it definitely knows how to use that mouse better than me - I can barely draw a straight line on those things.
The face is kinda lopsided, like Dylan's looking two directions at once. Maybe that's on purpose? Artists do weird stuff like that sometimes. The beard looks like someone took a paint brush and just dabbed it around randomly, but hey, beards are messy anyway so it works.
What gets me is they put him in this striped shirt that looks like something my Uncle Tony would wear to a barbecue. Very normal guy clothes for a famous musician. I respect that - no fancy nonsense.
There's some writing in the background that I can't read. Probably song words or something deep. Would've been nice if they made it bigger so us regular people could see what it says.
Overall? It's not terrible. Looks like someone actually tried, you know? Better than those modern art pieces that are just paint splattered everywhere. At least I can tell it's supposed to be a person. Would probably look decent hanging in a coffee shop somewhere.
Three out of five hammers.
Mack "Tank" Rodriguez<<
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